I would like to send a shout out to the mother-loving god of snails and baked beans.
The child slept through the night. And by "the child," I mean my child. And by "through the night," I mean, entirely...from 6:30 PM to 6:00 AM with nary a peep, whimper or blood-curdling scream.
The Bean's most recent *phase* has been waking up at 3:30 AM to demand a little nip of a bottle. Because who doesn't want a warm little tasty treat in the middle of the night? Except it means someone has to wake up and prepare said bottle and bring it to Her Highness and someone has to change Her Majesty's diaper since she's filled her overnight diaper to the brim from all the nips of milk.
And if you think that someone is my husband, well, I laugh in your general direction.
I'd like to interrupt this blog post to formally withdraw my love of Dr. Weissbluth, the traitor. I trusted you sir. Considering The Bean is now sleeping in her own room which is noticeably not in my bed, I have to admit your techniques work. BUT...when this new phase of waking up at 3 AM started and I consulted you for help, you took pages 263 and 264 of your book, made an origami knife and stabbed me in the back.
And I quote, "...babies may still awaken once or twice in the middle of the night. I consider this behavior normal, natural, and not changeworthy - if it's for a brief feeding and not prolonged playtime."
Back to your regularly scheduled post...
So when I woke up and rolled over to check the clock and saw 5:30 AM glaring its fluorescent green hate lasers into my eyeballs, I flew from the bed to The Bean's room since she obviously was dead.
Just as I was about to turn the knob to her room, I checked the monitor and she rolled over.
And by "rolled over," I mean she wasn't dead.
We may all survive this after all.